theoretically and realistically

Son asks his dad the difference between theoretically and realistically.

Dad says "Well it's a little bit difficult to explain but i have an idea, go and ask your mum if she would sleep with Wayne Rooney for a £1m"

Son comes back into the room and says "Mum says yes"

Dad says "Now go and ask your sister if she would"

Son comes back and says "She says yes"

Dad says "Now go and ask your brother if he would"

Son comes back and says "He says yes as well"

Well there you go son that's your answer.

Theoretically we're sitting on three million quid but realistically we're living with two slags and a fuckin' queer.