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Well that was fupping embarrassing. NO chances created in 90 mins against a League 2 side. No Baldock = no goals. We need to get our shit together and fast
West Ham starting XI
Henderson, Demel, Spence, Reid, McCartney, Noble, Nolan, O'Neil, Morrison, Cole, Vaz Te
Subs: Larkins, Wearen, Maynard, Pollitt, Hall, Taylor, Ruddock, Moncur, Turgott, Nasha, Lletget
Final score - Oxford United 1-0 West Ham United
92 mins - Clarke clears upfield and the final whistle is blown.
91 mins - Last chance. Maynard is fouled. Hall wants to take the free-kick, but seniority rules and Taylor will have it. Third-time lucky? No. He smashes the ball wide and high and into the stand.
89 mins - Well, with a few minutes to go, let's sum up. West Ham created a host of half-chances throughout the game, but could not fashion a real clear-cut opening aside from Nolan's low cross that Vaz Te poked over the top. On the plus side, it's been a competitive game and will have helped boost fitness levels. The goal from Oxford was a special finish. Meanwhile, the home fans are forecasting a difficult season ahead for their guests in song. Let's hope they are very wrong.
87 mins - A decent film must just have finished. The cinema car park is full of people returning to their cars. Either that, or it was a rubbish film and everyone has decided to leave early.
85 mins - Oxford are still on the offensive and looking for a second goal, but Craddock's shot is wayward this time. It flies well wide and out for a goal kick.
81 mins - Henderson gets a bit lucky. He calls to make the clearance, then mis-controls outside his box. He slips a bit but just about manages to make a challenge on Constable. Spence gets back and ensures no further damage is done.
80 mins - Boateng now shoves Taylor over on the left edge of the Oxford box. Free-kick. Hall to take. Hall whips it over and Turgott heads goalwards. Clarke tips over but the referee gives a goal kick. The home fans actually cheered their goalkeeper for making the fingertip stop.
78 mins - Embarrassing. Boateng gets down the right and latches on to a pass. He tries to take on Taylor before throwing himself to the ground inside the box. It's a clear dive, and Mr Scott goes over to tell the right-back to sort himself out.
77 mins - I know it's nearly over, but positionally, Nasha is at right-back with Spence, Wearen and Taylor alongside him. Turgott, Moncur, Ruddock and Porritt are across the midfield, with Hall supporting Maynard. Porritt has a go with a side volley, but the ball loops into the hands of Clarke.
76 mins - Turgott is fouled about 30 yards out and Taylor can have another go. It's almost exactly the same spot he fired over from about 25 minutes ago. This time his low shot hits the wall and spins through to Clarke.
74 mins - Hall again, swapping passes twice with Turgott wide on the right before getting to the byline and crossing high. Porritt gets there first, but his header lacks direction and flies wide of the far post. Hall is in the mood!
71 mins - Well, well, well. Porritt collects a deep cross and races forward to halfway before picking out Hall with a pinpoint 40-yard pass. Hall controls instantly and gets to within 22 yards before driving a low shot with his weaker right foot that hits the base of the far post before spinning away for a goal kick. The home fans cheer his name again.
70 mins - Oxford win a corner, but Henderson is there to make the catch when the cross comes in at the second attempt. West Ham try to break, but Moncur isn't as quick as the ball and Clarke catches inside his box.
68 mins - West Ham's youngsters will need to do something their senior colleagues could not if the Hammers are to avoid defeat here. Hall is doing his best as he picks out the run of Turgott. The winger crosses first-time and low but Maynard isn't quite far enough forward to finish. Good move, though.
66 mins - Rigg looks to get in on to a pass and he is bearing down on Henderson. Fair play to Taylor who races back and makes an inch-perfect sliding challenge inside the penalty area. No foul and Henderson can clear.
61 mins - Seven changes from West Ham. Noble, Morrison, Nolan, Reid, O'Neil, Demel and Vaz Te go off. Moncur, Porritt, Ruddock, Turgotg, Wearen, Nasha and Rob Hall come on. The Oxford fans welcome the latter with a chorus of 'Robbie, Robbie Hall'. He is a hero in these parts!
59 mins - A period of West Ham possession comes to nothing as Maynard tries to spin on the edge of the D. Oxford try to break forward but Spence is there to clear for a throw. From it, the U's build again before centre midfielder Forster-Caskey launches a shot into the car park.
57 mins - Craddock cuts in from the Oxford left and shoots powerfully. Henderson gets his body behind the ball and clutches it to his chest. Secure goalkeeping.
55 mins -
51 mins - Morrison collects a pass in a central position 30 yards out. He looks up, takes a touch but drags his low shot well wide of the left-hand post. Today's attendance is 4,780, with 1,101 of them from West Ham.
50 mins - West Ham have a free-kick about 30 yards out and Taylor is all over it. Meanwhile, Oxford have changed all ten outfield players. The back four is now Boateng, Raynes, Tafazoli and Capaldi, the midfield is Smith, Harris, Craddock and Forster-Caskey and Constable is partnering Rigg up front. Taylor curls the free-kick a yard over the top.
48 mins - Oxford have made a load of changes. Constable, Forster-Caskey, Raynes and Tafazoli are among those who have come on, but I've no idea who has gone off as yet. I'll try to find out!
46 mins - Two changes at the break for West Ham. Maynard and Oxford-born Taylor on for Cole and McCartney. Taylor is involved straight away, crossing dangerously and forcing a corner. Noble takes but it's cleared.
Half-time score - Oxford United 1-0 West Ham United
47 mins - That's half-time. Oxford lead. Join us again in a little under 15 minutes for the second half.
45 mins - We're going to have one added minute. Big Sam is out in his technical area. I would think he will demand an improvement at half-time. He'll certainly want his players to be more clinical.
41 mins - Cole lays the ball off from O'Neil's long pass to Morrison. He comes forward and does a step-over before trying to play in Cole, but the pass is behind the striker. It's been a case of 'so near yet so far' for West Ham - they've had the ball in plenty of encouraging positions without exploiting one as yet.
39 mins - West Ham attack and McCartney's cross is only cleared as far as O'Neil. He lofts the ball back in from the right edge of the penalty area. Vaz Te rises and goes to ground. He wants a penalty, but Mr Scott is again unmoved. Goal kick.
36 mins - GOAL! We have a goal and it's a great finish from Smalley. The cross comes over from the left and McCartney wins the header above Pittman, but the ball drops to the No10, who rockets the half-volley past Henderson from the angle. It might only be a pre-season game, but Big Sam will want a response from his players immediately.
36 mins - Morrison is seeing plenty of the ball for West Ham. The fans didn't see much of him last season following his arrival from Manchester United, but the youngster clearly has talent.
34 mins - The Oxford fans want a penalty as McAllister tries to cut between O'Neil and Spence and goes down. Mr Scott waves the appeals away.
32 mins - The corner is cleared but West Ham have it back. Morrison shows some neat footwork before Noble's pass is handled by Batt. Free-kick wide on the left. It's taken short to Nolan, who holds off his man inside the box and drills the cross over. Vaz Te is there, but the pace on the ball makes it a bit more difficult and the No12's first-time shot flies high and wide.
30 mins - Another ball in the car park as O'Neil wins it back in midfield and finds Cole. He waits for the overlap of Vaz Te, who shoots left-footed and sees his effort deflected over the fence by Evans for a corner.
28 mins - Back to the football and Demel skips past his man on the right touchline. The cross takes a nick of the head of Evans and is a bit awkward for Morrison. He controls on his chest and pokes the ball forward for Nolan, but it's difficult for the skipper and Clarke is there to collect.
27 mins - Mr Scott has a chat with Chapman and Noble, but no cards are shown. He then has a chat with captains Nolan and Wright. Presumably, his message was something along the lines of 'This is a pre-season match and I don't want loads of paperwork to do!'.
24 mins - Erm, it has all got a bit tasty here. Noble goes in hard but fair on Pittman and the Oxford players react angrily. One, Adam Chapman, charges at Noble and there is a coming together. This leads to some handbags involving at least 16 players, but it is all over as quickly as it started. Now the officials are having a chat...
22 mins - Another half-chance. Nolan finds the overlapping McCartney and he stands the cross up on the edge of the six-yard box. Clarke comes to claim, but he drops the ball. Oxford try to break from the clearance, but Reid gets in a strong sliding challenge. That gets the players going and the action only ends when Morrison is brought down by Potter. Noble doesn't like the challenge. Nor does the referee as Mr Scott talks to the former Havant and Waterlooville man.
20 mins - West Ham come close twice. First, Vaz Te beats two men before trying to trick his way past Wright inside the box, but he's challenged. Then, Nolan crosses towards Cole and Evans clears at the near post.
16 mins - The corner nearly leads to a goal...for Oxford! O'Neil collects the short corner and his cross is headed clear powerfully. Spence is favourite to get there, but Pittman beats him to the ball and is in on goal. He elects to shoot from the edge of the D, but he leans back and the ball flies too high. Relief for Spence.
14 mins - Golden opportunity for the first goal as Demel plays a superb one-two with Nolan and gets to the byline and beats his man. Cole is unmarked for the pull-back six yards from goal, but Demel picks the wrong option and the ball goes behind for a corner. The flag-kick is cleared. West Ham come again and Morrison and Nolan force another corner.
12 mins - The West Ham fans on the far side sing Carlton Cole's name as West Ham come forward once more. Vaz Te does well to shake off McGinty but his cross is just a little too strong for Morrison. McCartney crosses from the nearside but Cole is beaten to the ball.
8 mins - This is a decent game so far. The Oxford fans give it a bit of noise after their team attack again and a couple of strong challenges go in. Batt crosses and Pittman challenges. Spence heads the ball backwards and Henderson is out again quickly to catch ahead of Smalley.
6 mins - West Ham break quickly and Morrison finds Vaz Te in space. He cuts inside from the left and shoots from 25 yards. It's too high and clears the crossbar, fence and three rows of cars before nestling next to a tree.
5 mins - West Ham look to be in total control until Morrison gives the ball away in midfield. Oxford break and a low cross threatens until McCartney puts the ball out for a corner. Heslop's corner is headed up into the air before Pittman's header is held by Henderson
4 mins - A momentary scare as Smalley brings down Reid and the Kiwi clutches his ankle. It's nothing to worry about though, as Reid is quickly back up.
2 mins - Oxford come forward but Reid makes the headed clearance. The Hammers then win a free-kick as Demel is fouled. All very low-key so far.
7.49pm - West Ham kick-off shooting from right to left. Tonight, it means the Hammers are shooting towards an end with no stand. Any wayward shots could threaten aerials and wing mirrors in the cinema car park behind the goal!
West Ham starting XI
Henderson, Demel, Spence, Reid, McCartney, Noble, Nolan, O'Neil, Morrison, Cole, Vaz Te
Subs: Larkins, Wearen, Maynard, Pollitt, Hall, Taylor, Ruddock, Moncur, Turgott, Nasha, Lletget
Final score - Oxford United 1-0 West Ham United
92 mins - Clarke clears upfield and the final whistle is blown.
91 mins - Last chance. Maynard is fouled. Hall wants to take the free-kick, but seniority rules and Taylor will have it. Third-time lucky? No. He smashes the ball wide and high and into the stand.
89 mins - Well, with a few minutes to go, let's sum up. West Ham created a host of half-chances throughout the game, but could not fashion a real clear-cut opening aside from Nolan's low cross that Vaz Te poked over the top. On the plus side, it's been a competitive game and will have helped boost fitness levels. The goal from Oxford was a special finish. Meanwhile, the home fans are forecasting a difficult season ahead for their guests in song. Let's hope they are very wrong.
87 mins - A decent film must just have finished. The cinema car park is full of people returning to their cars. Either that, or it was a rubbish film and everyone has decided to leave early.
85 mins - Oxford are still on the offensive and looking for a second goal, but Craddock's shot is wayward this time. It flies well wide and out for a goal kick.
81 mins - Henderson gets a bit lucky. He calls to make the clearance, then mis-controls outside his box. He slips a bit but just about manages to make a challenge on Constable. Spence gets back and ensures no further damage is done.
80 mins - Boateng now shoves Taylor over on the left edge of the Oxford box. Free-kick. Hall to take. Hall whips it over and Turgott heads goalwards. Clarke tips over but the referee gives a goal kick. The home fans actually cheered their goalkeeper for making the fingertip stop.
78 mins - Embarrassing. Boateng gets down the right and latches on to a pass. He tries to take on Taylor before throwing himself to the ground inside the box. It's a clear dive, and Mr Scott goes over to tell the right-back to sort himself out.
77 mins - I know it's nearly over, but positionally, Nasha is at right-back with Spence, Wearen and Taylor alongside him. Turgott, Moncur, Ruddock and Porritt are across the midfield, with Hall supporting Maynard. Porritt has a go with a side volley, but the ball loops into the hands of Clarke.
76 mins - Turgott is fouled about 30 yards out and Taylor can have another go. It's almost exactly the same spot he fired over from about 25 minutes ago. This time his low shot hits the wall and spins through to Clarke.
74 mins - Hall again, swapping passes twice with Turgott wide on the right before getting to the byline and crossing high. Porritt gets there first, but his header lacks direction and flies wide of the far post. Hall is in the mood!
71 mins - Well, well, well. Porritt collects a deep cross and races forward to halfway before picking out Hall with a pinpoint 40-yard pass. Hall controls instantly and gets to within 22 yards before driving a low shot with his weaker right foot that hits the base of the far post before spinning away for a goal kick. The home fans cheer his name again.
70 mins - Oxford win a corner, but Henderson is there to make the catch when the cross comes in at the second attempt. West Ham try to break, but Moncur isn't as quick as the ball and Clarke catches inside his box.
68 mins - West Ham's youngsters will need to do something their senior colleagues could not if the Hammers are to avoid defeat here. Hall is doing his best as he picks out the run of Turgott. The winger crosses first-time and low but Maynard isn't quite far enough forward to finish. Good move, though.
66 mins - Rigg looks to get in on to a pass and he is bearing down on Henderson. Fair play to Taylor who races back and makes an inch-perfect sliding challenge inside the penalty area. No foul and Henderson can clear.
61 mins - Seven changes from West Ham. Noble, Morrison, Nolan, Reid, O'Neil, Demel and Vaz Te go off. Moncur, Porritt, Ruddock, Turgotg, Wearen, Nasha and Rob Hall come on. The Oxford fans welcome the latter with a chorus of 'Robbie, Robbie Hall'. He is a hero in these parts!
59 mins - A period of West Ham possession comes to nothing as Maynard tries to spin on the edge of the D. Oxford try to break forward but Spence is there to clear for a throw. From it, the U's build again before centre midfielder Forster-Caskey launches a shot into the car park.
57 mins - Craddock cuts in from the Oxford left and shoots powerfully. Henderson gets his body behind the ball and clutches it to his chest. Secure goalkeeping.
55 mins -
51 mins - Morrison collects a pass in a central position 30 yards out. He looks up, takes a touch but drags his low shot well wide of the left-hand post. Today's attendance is 4,780, with 1,101 of them from West Ham.
50 mins - West Ham have a free-kick about 30 yards out and Taylor is all over it. Meanwhile, Oxford have changed all ten outfield players. The back four is now Boateng, Raynes, Tafazoli and Capaldi, the midfield is Smith, Harris, Craddock and Forster-Caskey and Constable is partnering Rigg up front. Taylor curls the free-kick a yard over the top.
48 mins - Oxford have made a load of changes. Constable, Forster-Caskey, Raynes and Tafazoli are among those who have come on, but I've no idea who has gone off as yet. I'll try to find out!
46 mins - Two changes at the break for West Ham. Maynard and Oxford-born Taylor on for Cole and McCartney. Taylor is involved straight away, crossing dangerously and forcing a corner. Noble takes but it's cleared.
Half-time score - Oxford United 1-0 West Ham United
47 mins - That's half-time. Oxford lead. Join us again in a little under 15 minutes for the second half.
45 mins - We're going to have one added minute. Big Sam is out in his technical area. I would think he will demand an improvement at half-time. He'll certainly want his players to be more clinical.
41 mins - Cole lays the ball off from O'Neil's long pass to Morrison. He comes forward and does a step-over before trying to play in Cole, but the pass is behind the striker. It's been a case of 'so near yet so far' for West Ham - they've had the ball in plenty of encouraging positions without exploiting one as yet.
39 mins - West Ham attack and McCartney's cross is only cleared as far as O'Neil. He lofts the ball back in from the right edge of the penalty area. Vaz Te rises and goes to ground. He wants a penalty, but Mr Scott is again unmoved. Goal kick.
36 mins - GOAL! We have a goal and it's a great finish from Smalley. The cross comes over from the left and McCartney wins the header above Pittman, but the ball drops to the No10, who rockets the half-volley past Henderson from the angle. It might only be a pre-season game, but Big Sam will want a response from his players immediately.
36 mins - Morrison is seeing plenty of the ball for West Ham. The fans didn't see much of him last season following his arrival from Manchester United, but the youngster clearly has talent.
34 mins - The Oxford fans want a penalty as McAllister tries to cut between O'Neil and Spence and goes down. Mr Scott waves the appeals away.
32 mins - The corner is cleared but West Ham have it back. Morrison shows some neat footwork before Noble's pass is handled by Batt. Free-kick wide on the left. It's taken short to Nolan, who holds off his man inside the box and drills the cross over. Vaz Te is there, but the pace on the ball makes it a bit more difficult and the No12's first-time shot flies high and wide.
30 mins - Another ball in the car park as O'Neil wins it back in midfield and finds Cole. He waits for the overlap of Vaz Te, who shoots left-footed and sees his effort deflected over the fence by Evans for a corner.
28 mins - Back to the football and Demel skips past his man on the right touchline. The cross takes a nick of the head of Evans and is a bit awkward for Morrison. He controls on his chest and pokes the ball forward for Nolan, but it's difficult for the skipper and Clarke is there to collect.
27 mins - Mr Scott has a chat with Chapman and Noble, but no cards are shown. He then has a chat with captains Nolan and Wright. Presumably, his message was something along the lines of 'This is a pre-season match and I don't want loads of paperwork to do!'.
24 mins - Erm, it has all got a bit tasty here. Noble goes in hard but fair on Pittman and the Oxford players react angrily. One, Adam Chapman, charges at Noble and there is a coming together. This leads to some handbags involving at least 16 players, but it is all over as quickly as it started. Now the officials are having a chat...
22 mins - Another half-chance. Nolan finds the overlapping McCartney and he stands the cross up on the edge of the six-yard box. Clarke comes to claim, but he drops the ball. Oxford try to break from the clearance, but Reid gets in a strong sliding challenge. That gets the players going and the action only ends when Morrison is brought down by Potter. Noble doesn't like the challenge. Nor does the referee as Mr Scott talks to the former Havant and Waterlooville man.
20 mins - West Ham come close twice. First, Vaz Te beats two men before trying to trick his way past Wright inside the box, but he's challenged. Then, Nolan crosses towards Cole and Evans clears at the near post.
16 mins - The corner nearly leads to a goal...for Oxford! O'Neil collects the short corner and his cross is headed clear powerfully. Spence is favourite to get there, but Pittman beats him to the ball and is in on goal. He elects to shoot from the edge of the D, but he leans back and the ball flies too high. Relief for Spence.
14 mins - Golden opportunity for the first goal as Demel plays a superb one-two with Nolan and gets to the byline and beats his man. Cole is unmarked for the pull-back six yards from goal, but Demel picks the wrong option and the ball goes behind for a corner. The flag-kick is cleared. West Ham come again and Morrison and Nolan force another corner.
12 mins - The West Ham fans on the far side sing Carlton Cole's name as West Ham come forward once more. Vaz Te does well to shake off McGinty but his cross is just a little too strong for Morrison. McCartney crosses from the nearside but Cole is beaten to the ball.
8 mins - This is a decent game so far. The Oxford fans give it a bit of noise after their team attack again and a couple of strong challenges go in. Batt crosses and Pittman challenges. Spence heads the ball backwards and Henderson is out again quickly to catch ahead of Smalley.
6 mins - West Ham break quickly and Morrison finds Vaz Te in space. He cuts inside from the left and shoots from 25 yards. It's too high and clears the crossbar, fence and three rows of cars before nestling next to a tree.
5 mins - West Ham look to be in total control until Morrison gives the ball away in midfield. Oxford break and a low cross threatens until McCartney puts the ball out for a corner. Heslop's corner is headed up into the air before Pittman's header is held by Henderson
4 mins - A momentary scare as Smalley brings down Reid and the Kiwi clutches his ankle. It's nothing to worry about though, as Reid is quickly back up.
2 mins - Oxford come forward but Reid makes the headed clearance. The Hammers then win a free-kick as Demel is fouled. All very low-key so far.
7.49pm - West Ham kick-off shooting from right to left. Tonight, it means the Hammers are shooting towards an end with no stand. Any wayward shots could threaten aerials and wing mirrors in the cinema car park behind the goal!
