West Ham Cockney Boys


    WHUFC vs Sheff Utd -- Saturday, October 25th, 2019

    westhamonkey
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:10 pm


    missed the first 4:47 because I couldn't get my are out of bed... recently that's been the only decent time we've put int the game.. so this could be even more painful than usual.

    we're playing Sheffield Utd.... not only that... our form has been so shit recently that we're actually BELOW the Blades in the table.

    Let that sink in for a moment... B-E-L-O-W Sheffield Utd... they've not even been in the top flight for several years.. those same northern monkeys who sued us as many times as it took to get the answer they wanted and cost us 25 million quid in the process...

    Yes... THAT Sheff Utd... we're below them in the table...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:11 pm


    10 minites... a Snoddy corner goes nowhere... let's see how the second goes... punched clear by the Blades keeper
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:13 pm


    team news????

    Well Snoddy plays...

    Balbuena is out there... Cresswell... anderson... Haller...

    looks like Roberto in goal still...

    Zabaleta

    of course... the dynamic midfield of Noble and rice...

    Yarmo starts...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:15 pm



    seems typical West Ham philosophy... following games... especially last week where we only got in to the opposite box twice in an hour... change the defense and keep the midfield and forwards the same...

    its not like we even deserve to win anything...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:19 pm


    nah... we got nothing... no penetration, no movement....

    so at least we know changing the team and formation doesn't change the substance of our play...

    18 minus gone... we've had 65% of the possession... done nothing with it.
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:20 pm


    so if things don't change in our favor, we'll remain below the Blades...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:22 pm


    Zabaleta slips in behind the defense...yup... granddad Zabaleta... gets in behind... we can't manage a shot out of it...

    we've just had our fourth corner... so that's an improvement on last week...

    Yarmo goes it alone and wins a fifth corner...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:25 pm


    corner comes in... ball comes out... ball played in... ball comes out...

    of course... no West Ham player gets to any of the corners first... well duh... where's Ogbonna? He's usually in there getting his head to the ball... but of course... he's not playing....

    so in typical West Ham style... take out the player who gets to the most corners... and get a bunch of corners... you can't make this shit up.


    and another corner to West Ham...

    odds on which team gets to the ball first?
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:25 pm


    if you took 'keeper punches it clear' you won big...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:31 pm


    Sheff Utd smort score rom their corner... panicked diving save form a cheeky back heel...

    it's pouring with rain... we should bring on Carlos Tevez to do a half time team talk...

    I wonder how many people even remember that debacle today... or remember that the Blades cos themselves their place in the top league... not us.



    another West Ham corner... another time a Blades defender gets to the ball first...


    half hour done.
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:37 pm


    hospital ball form Zab sets up a Sheffield attack... but to be fair... the old geezer does run back and foul the layer with the ball to stop it...

    of course... when the Blades put the ball in our box, one of THEIR players gets to it first... but the header is weak and straight at Roberto...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:43 pm


    by the time we're all next here, Halloween will have passed us by... so let's take a moment to listen to a word form our sponsors...

    [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

    I know... I know... shameless self promotion. In case you've not paid attention to me profile pic... someone dug up one of me old films and it's now available in the UK for the first ever time in glorious 4k...

    so if you're tired of watching West Ham pissing about (the Blades almost score) why not take a butcher's at a slice of horror film history????

    WHUFC vs Sheff Utd -- Saturday, October 25th, 2019 SKINNER_SLIPCASE_2D_PACK_720x

    anyway... back to our regularly scheduled program....
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:46 pm


    it was a Roberto fingertip that saved our blushes...

    now the Blades thin they're onto something and are dominating possession in the last 90 seconds of regular time in the first half...

    but it doesn't matter...

    the team changes are on point... Snoddy goes flying down the pitch... ignores all his team mates and slots it beneath the advancing keeper...

    it was a high lofted ball out of the defense... a first time pass from Yarmo to find the oncoming Snoddy...

    we've had 45 minutes now... and West Ham lead... 1-0 to the cockney boys...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:46 pm


    bubbles are floating around the rain soaked stadium... and the half time whistle goes...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 3:48 pm


    the Blades have had 6 attempts to our 3... 2 on target to our one... we've had 68% of the possession... but we have Snoddy's goal to give us a lift before the tea and oranges come out...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:06 pm


    2nd half starts... west Ham corner... Sheffield get to it first...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:11 pm


    close range shot slams into Roberto... Cresswell clears. the Blades make a change...

    53 minutes gone...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:12 pm


    Yarmo gets a good run in on goal but then gets bundled off the ball...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:15 pm


    ugh... coulda woulda shoulda...

    good break by us... but Anderson fucks up the final pass to Yarmo and playsi it slow and behnd him so Yarmo can't make the decisive move... Anderson gets the ball back but is too slow to do anything with it other than hit the keeper...

    the Blades are leaving space behind as they try to get something from this game... we're not good enough to capitalize...

    fortunately we have the lead... so that's nice.
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:16 pm


    the guardian saw it thusly...

    "West Ham waste a three-on-two attack! Yarmolenko plays a lovely ball into Anderson who shoots straight at Henderson instead of squaring to Haller, who had an open goal. Will they regret that?"
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:20 pm


    just over an hour gone... the Blades hit wide form close range...

    another Sheffield substitution...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:21 pm


    Lanzini is going to come on... chances that noble will be the player to make way?????
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:22 pm


    very lucky offside flag saves our blushes as Sheff Utd get the ball in the back of the net.

    correct decision as the back line holds well but we shouldn't be allowing them the time or the space to even get close...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:23 pm


    of course Noble doesn't go of... why would he?

    Anderson makes way...

    so now we have three in midfield and a lonely Haller up front by himself...

    sounds like a recipe for a Blades equalizer to me...
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    Post  westhamonkey on Sat 26 Oct 2019, 4:27 pm


    it's not like I'm any kind of footballing genius...

    but sheff utd get the equalizer...

    7 hammers players at the back, including the awful noble making a piss poor effort of a challenge on the player who slips a long, low slow ball into the far corner of the net...

    nothing more than we (or they) deserve...

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