WHUFC vs Crystal Palace January 30th, 2018

well... the end of January already...

Facebook is all a fury about the fans ire at the..... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz I can't deal with the stupidity of so many of our 'fans' - does my little monkey head in...

anyway... more important matters afoot... we got a game... and what a game it will be...

Injury crisis? what injury crisis...

This is the team...

del Castillo Adrian
Pablo Zabaleta
James Collins
Angelo Ogbonna
Aaron Cresswell
Declan Rice
Sam Byram
Mark Noble
Cheikhou Kouyate
Eduardo Joao Mario
Javier Hernandez

...maybe

and these are the back-ups...

Jose Fonte
Sead Haksabanovic
Joe Hart
Antonio Martinez
Josh Cullen
Reece Oxford
Domingos Quina

what could possibly go wrong?

not much can change based on today's results... so it'll be essential to bank three points if we can.

Huddersfield could jump ahead of us if we don't and they do... but who can figure out whether Liverpool will bother to show up

Swansea should go down to the Arse but even if they don't all they'll do is compress the number of teams fighting for survival...

Hello Westhamonkey, I'm with you tonight owing to a bad cold and our new ground being one of the coldest grounds to be in.

oh... and obviously if Palace beat us we're back in the fucked up again..

But we have kicked off...

22 seconds gone... all west ham possession so far - meaning it's taking that long for Adrian to play it out... but Palace come straight back at us...

Charlie Ham wrote:Hello Westhamonkey, I'm with you tonight owing to a bad cold and our new ground being one of the coldest grounds to be in.

Evenin' Chas... I don't blame you...

Hot water with Lemon and honey in it...


How does a West Ham free kick in our half end up what Palace attacking?

oooh... almost something cool...

We snatch back possession and a ball to Kayoute loops to Chicha and then a head back to Mario who completely fluffs his shot and shoots wide from 10 yards out...

Chicharito not reacting fast enough in the box and Tompkins (we should never have sold him) gets there first... West Ham corner comes to nothing... but at least we're starting to press forward...

blimey... couple of tackles going in... you could almost think we might be... you know... "up" for it...

West Ham corner...

almost 15 minutes gone... pretty much 50/50 possession...

Kayoute gets an elbow in the head and he's down with a bit of claret on his head...


Oh jesus... David Gold is sitting with Barry Fry...

I hope Martinez is watching... Kayoute is getting his head wrapped up... and is gonna play on.

and there you go... Palace attack... we've been dodgy in defense for a while now... trying to attack so all the defense go up field... of course... we concede possession and get caught out on the counter...

Benteke with a free header into the back of the net..

half way through the first half... a goal down... at home...

Ogbonna heads over from a corner... pretty much a free header... got to at least get them on target...

possession percentages have changed up a bit... 38-62... is the home team really supposed to sit back and just defend?

I mean, you can see why we do it when we're so easily dispossessed and so poor at defending... but it's hardly the way


I mean... 7 West Ham players in the box and Palace still get a shot on goal that has to be tipped out for a Palace corner...

and the corner comes in and NO ONE in the 6 yard box does anything till it skitters to Kouyate's feet and he hoofs it away...

this time 9 West Ham players in the box (again, not including Adrian) and again, palace have all the possession until they shoot over the bar...

Comms tells us we need to whip in the crosses...

so we get a lucky break... Cresswell goes down the wing... whips a ball into the middle of the 6 yard box... but there's no West Ham players close enough to get to it...

our midfield is non-existent

ooh... a penalty..

Tompkins gives it away (I knew we were right to sell him)

ugh... Noble's gonna take it... so all the fan boys will be able to say he's our savior...


He scores...

First thing he's done all game...


three minutes till half time... prolly about 4-5 minutes of injury time to get through as well...

All came from Mario up front on his own... holding off 5 Palace defenders and manages to slide the ball out to Chicharito who goes for the ball but Tompkins trailing leg catches him as Chicha tries to turn back inside...

Another West Ham attack.. chaocharito can't hold off 3 Palace defenders and it comes to nothing...

well at least the panlty has put a bit of a spring in our step...

6 minutes of injury time...

Palace go close...

again... even with 9 in the box we still manage to allow Palace to shoot

tomkins is gonna go in the book for a tackle on Chicharito - bit harsh... wasn't really a foul...

the resulting free kick ends up....





if you guessed... right back with Adrian to play it out which then lead to a Palace attack that ended in a powerful shot that just went over the bar...
then you'd be right

First half ends at 51:12

all square goals-wise... but it's not easy going and we'll need to get our shit together for the 2nd half if we're gonna save this.

2nd Half gets underway

good cross by Cresswell... but palace come out with it

Kayoute foul (worse than the Tompkins one but he doesn't get a card)

Palace free kick just outside the area...


straight into Adrian's arms...

good build up... from Noble (I'll give him credit when he deserves it) through the middle via Mario (who's pretty much playing that role on his own)

slots it out wide... Byram whips it in and Chcha gets a great header but it goes straight at the keeper...

Palace counter immediately but our defense decides to stand up and stops them...

if this stays the same... we'll actually climb a place to 10th.

If we were to win... we'll actually climb 2 places to 9th.

Lots of Palace pressure...

Mario is looking good... better as the game goes on.

The game is beginning to stretch out a bit - chichis worrying given how easily we get caught out on the counter...

just about an hour on the clock...

30 minutes to fupp it up or save it