WHUFC vs Fulham -- February 22, 2019

morning all,

everyone nicely rested after the enforced break thanks to our shitty performance in the cup?

yeah, didn't think so.

Here's the alleged team line-up:

West Ham: Fabianski, Zabaleta, Diop, Ogbonna, Cresswell, Noble, Rice, Snodgrass, Antonio, Hernandez, Felipe Anderson. Subs: Arnautovic, Carroll, Lanzini, Adrian, Obiang, Nasri, Fredericks.

Good to see Lanzini back in the squad, hope he's the good Lanzini not the kinda passenger/Anderson-type Lanzini

Not sure why Arnie and Nasri aren't starting...

almost any perm from these 18 players should be more than capable of stuffing Fulham out of sight... but we all know there is plenty of evidence that these same players are also capable of getting turned over by pretty much anyone...

we shall see.

so, Fulham have not won on the road this season...

welcome to the West Ham United charity home for ne'erdowell opponents...


2:45 to go until kick-off... the players have walked out with the kids, handshakes, etc...

one commercial break and we're off..

our not-so-good performances recently means that even with a win today, the best we can manage is to swap places with Everton... that's how much we've thrown away recently... where we could have been up and consolidating our position in or around 7th place we're...


and we interrupt this broadcast to announce that on 40 seconds we gift the ball the Fulham leaving them one on one with the keeper...

it was a casual back pass from Zabaleta that required a diving save from Fabianski to save us from going a goal down in less than a minute.

Fulham are well up for this... we're not.

and it matters not a jot

because Fulham attack... Noble chasing hopelessly in midfield...

ball out to the wing...

Zabaleta's outstretch foot gets nowhere near the ball

Attacker left completely unmarked in the 6 yard box

and the ball is in the back of the net.

Great way to silence the crowd...

0-1 in less than 4 minutes.

well we've hardly done anything against the 2nd bottom team in the division - way to go to dominate at home.

although having said that, we just had a corner and Diop rose to head a ball that shaved just wide of the post...

but Fulham aren't laying down (like we are)

Fredericks must be pissed that Zabaleta got the starting nod over him...

Here's the Guardian's take on Zabaleta's performance thus far....


4 mins: Zabaleta also plays a part in this, losing Sessegnon on Fulham’s left flank. Sessegnon immediately plays a low, hard cross into the six-yard box, and Babel turns it in!

GOAL! West Ham 0-1 Fulham (Babel, 3 mins)

And he makes amends within seconds!

1 min: Incredible miss! Zabaleta’s hopeless backpass releases Ryan Babel, who advances on the keeper, does a stepover or two and then passes the ball into his face!

we're getting a bit more possession but there's zero end product, everything is being easily cut out by the Fulham defense.

watching this it's just weird to think we could have been a few results away from pushing to break into the top 7 or 6... because we don't look at all like a team that should be doing that.

15 minutes gone and Fulham while not looking comfortable, certainly don't look in any danger.

The crowd has been suitably quiet by our lack of performance...

Typical bloody West Ham.

Zabaleta tries to pass to noble but noble is so slow the Fulham midfield easily nick the ball off him and go on the attack...

Yes, there's two prime candidates to be substituted already...

antonio gets brought down on the wing, free kick to WHUFC just outside the area...

Anderson tries to curl the ball around the defense bu t it's easily cut out by fulham... the crowd is already audibly anxious and angry about things... that's not going to get any better as a West Ham advantage turned into anther Fulham attack...

halfway through the first half...

comms is calling our performance "listless"

they're not wrong but they're also being polite...

we've had all the rest in the world, we've had a nice trip to the seaside in Spain...

and we come back like we couldn't give a shit and have no idea how to play the game...

you wouldn't be surprised with this type of performance if the players had not seen each other in 6 months...

noble loses out in midfield (yet again)

If both results stand today, Watford will be 7 points clear of us

another corner to us...

straight at the keeper...

but he does the indefensible and weakly punches up into the air...

head tennis between Antonio, Ogbonna and finally Chicharito who puts the ball into the back of the net...

his 50th goal in the Prem...

looking forward to VAR being introduced next season because the slow motion replays clearly show that Chicharito used his hand to put the ball in the back of the net...

So being a scrappy goal that should have been disallowed and kinda against the run of play it has completely failed to lift the crowd...

but we're all square on half an hour.

and we're getting more possession

not a bad summary of how it went down...

31 mins: That is absolute pure cheatery, no doubt about it. Hernandez fell over in the process of arming the ball over the line and stayed down long enough that he didn’t have to look anyone in the eye as he got to his feet.

GOAL! West Ham 1-1 Fulham (Hernandez, 29 mins)

West Ham win another corner corner, their fifth. Rico comes out to punch clear but makes a massive hash of it, Antonio heads it back in, it flicks off Ogbonna and Hernandez turns it in with a combination of head and left arm at the far post!


The crowd are finally singing 'bubbles' - Fulham haven't had a touch in several minutes... not that we're actually doing anything with the possession

we're currently in 9th but 4 points behind Watford...

you'd think being 4 points behind Watford would mean you're doomed to relegation... not in the top half of the Premiership...

but it's a funny old game.

the wags at the Guardian have now dubbed him "Cheatcharito"

but there's no doubts about this one...

perfectly placed corner... the keeper decides not to even try to come for it... the defense decides not to track any players and Diop runs unmarked into position to meet the ball and head it down into the net...

now the crowd is on the up...

now Fulham are looking fragile

now we are attacking with purpose...

and our 8th corner brings out a good save from the keeper as Antonio goes down low at the near post to head towards goal...

the 9th corner goes nowhere... and ends up back with Fabianski (how many times do we do that)

at least the Guardian is honest... "Going back to the West Ham goal, the cheatery will handily deflect attention from Sergio Rico’s utterly useless attempt to flap clear. Had he done his job decently, the rest of it would never have happened."

so... halfway through the 2 minutes of added time...

we've salvaged what was a nightmare - although mainly by virtue of Fulham being Fulham (as the comms said) rather than us being any good.

the big question now... and kind of a worry... is how will we faire in the 2nd half?

we totally threw away a game and three points last time out by completely failing to turn up for the 2nd half...

same again and we're fucked... but surely we won't do that again... am I right?

2nd half starts... no changes for us - two changes for Fulham

can't say I disagree with this assessment of things thus far...

"A surprisingly calm start to the second half. West Ham are hogging possession, but don’t seem inclined to actually get into Fulham’s penalty area."

wait a minute... BBC is saying Fredericks has replaced Zabaleta... I need to concentrate harder....

why would you use the phrase "what a pro" to describe Mark Noble when all he's done is win the ball back after being cheaply dispossessed by not paying any attention to where the opposition players are?

even the comms started the sentence with 'cheaply dispossesed'

halfway thru the 2nd half... lack of updates because although we've been hogging the possession we''ve done basically nothing with it.

Arnie comes on to replace Chcicharito... kinda unfortunate for Chicharito who has done nothing wrong... not sure the like-for-like substitution really does anything for us... it's the link-up from the midfield where the problems are... so that won't change with the same lackluster bunch out there doing the same thing.

noble would have been a better option to lose

so would Anderson who has become his usual anonymous self this half

Fredericks puts in a great goal attempt saving tackle in the penalty box.. if only he'd been on in the first half we might never have conceded.

Watford are three goals to the good so there's no way they're letting fo of 7th place...

Lanzini is coming on... big cheer from the crowd.

Anderson is the player to make way... no arguments there... anderson has done very little all game and nothing in the second half...

and I know you're all bored with me saying it... but I have no idea how Noble is still on the pitch... yes, there's a bunch of players... Noble, Anderson, Antonio who could easily come off... but I'm never less than surprised that in his current form how Noble continues to get picked and survives when obviously better layers get taken off.

even the people who get paid to do this are struggling to come up with anything to say about this game...


nice three player attack, Lanzini, Snodgrass and Anrie linking up but Arnie's eventual header brings out a one handed save from the Fulham keeper.

he crowd actually feel enthused enough to launch into a chorus of COYI - but probably just to keep themselves warm...